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A lot of kids birthday party theme ideas are based on contemporary movies, TV shows, and characters. If you want to try a different alternative to the common birthday party theme for kids that'll still give children a fun-filled day, try throwing a "grown up" dinner party or afternoon tea. Let kids choose their own "grown-up" invitation to send out to guests. You can help the kids decorate a more formal place setting and menu. Make place cards so that everyone knows where they'll be sitting. Then let the kids dress up in their version of grown up attire.
For children who are more computer savvy, you might consider a party theme based on a non-violent computer or video game. One advantage to this party theme is the ability to make some of the invitations or party supplies yourself. Many sites have images or logos that you can download to make accessories for a party. Once the celebration is underway, you can continue the party theme by creating teams and letting each child have a turn playing the computer game that the party theme is based on. If the children are too young to play the game together, modify the activities by creating a challenge that the kids can participate in. For example, re-enacting a scene from the game or searching for objects that appear in the game.